4-8

Interviews.

Had one last week. Had a fresh one this morning. Another gig for cleaning buildings. Case Western, various facilities and such. Not so hot since I wasn't feeling like myself on waking up this morning. Picked it up in the middle of the interview which granted me to fill out a physical app. No phone is a bummer since email is almost exactly ancient technology as far as contacting someone. Speaking of that I got offered a phone interview with yet another company earlier this afternoon. I opted to call them at their discretion. Pfft

Anyway my final trail is tomorrow. Will I be going to jail? Performing community service? Put on house arrest? Or put BACK on probation. Pfft

Im just so sick of the system that its beginning to be comical. I dont feel like going in on that. So there

What I do feel like talking about though is those letters I wrote to my ex. It was the stupidest, silliest, most safest and most realistic move I could have made since I've been gone.

The letters (which are high school style hand written) arent anything ridiculous or too out of the ordinary. Just the average "I want to come home" "Lets start things over" "Dont throw away years of blah blah blah" which I did mean every word. Its just, I feel like I've been through this so many times Im beginning to feel numb to the pain of how it goes. In this case, I dont have family to really fall back on, so its almost a must that I get my ass back up in that place whether or not we become sweeties doing tweeties or just good buds.

But no I read old emails from the beginning of the relationship, felt the feels a little bit, we were almost totally different people then, young and innocent, no system there to boss us around no outside influences to make anything strange no rumor mill nothing like that. How lucky could two people be. Things happen, and I looked at her page today and saw a "New Boo Needed" post on her timeline. My timing couldn't have been better?

Went for a walk yesterday in what was some of the best weather I have ever had the pleasure to breathe in. The air wasn't thick, the breeze wasn't cold, the sun wasn't piping hot. Literally perfect, like L.A. came to visit. I went to the store got some trail mix and hot bags of snacks and tracked it over to a sitting of benches where I read an X-Men Gold comic. It was good.

The day before that, which was also perfect weather, strangely too perfect, I sat at the lake and just let my mind be taken by the waves. I regret not playing Spades at the shelter when I got offered. I dont know I just havent been feeling like my good old self for these past at least four days. I eat, sleep, use the restroom nothing snaps me back into play. Strange very strange.

I think thats it for now. Im thinking about some Switch, wish I had my power pack and also thinking about work. I have a few phone calls to make tomorrow to see where I stand on a few jobs. Until then Ill just continue to read and play on the iPad mini. Need headphones for iPod.

Till then. Dont think you know. Know you know.

PEACE